Baseball, Accidents, and Serpentine Lines

The Chicago Sox won the world series yesterday. I'm kind of like one of those guys you saw on the news describing how they've been a Sox fan their whole life and that they lived, breathed, and died by the Sox, when in reality they just started watching them in the second round of the playoffs and a few months ago they just thought they were cotton things you put on your feet.

I like the bandwagon though. Whats not to like about bandwagons? A bunch of people hanging out in a wagon cheering loudly and drinking to something that is of little or no relevance to their lives except for the fact that it is supposed to be of relevance to your life at that given time or you won't have anything insightful to say in front of the water cooler.

I love when I'm an hour late for work because there is a huge accident/spectacle on the expressway on the other side. And theres a line to see the accident. Its not like theres anything in the way of people getting to where they need to go. People just feel the need to stop and watch the mangled car or the turned over semi-truck and whatnot. With such curiousity. And I sit in line on the Eisenhower and 40 minutes in, I think wow!! something amazing must be up at the end of this line of cars. Maybe Tom Cruise has stopped on the expressway to personally shake every reverse commuter's hand, or maybe Frito Lay is handing out free bags of chips to everyone, or fuck I don't know, something sweet has to be up there. But no, its always a mangled car or some gory scene that I personally would rather not see up close.

Its kind of like when I went to Great America last weekend with my girlfriend and we waited almost two hours to go on that fucking Superman Rollercoaster they have over there. If i wait two hours in serpentine lines there better be a pot of gold at the end or something sweet that i've never even heard of before, not a half baked theme park ride.

But I guess nothing is worse than waiting in line to go to work. motherfucker. But wasn't that an amazing baseball game?

Updaten

You know you are getting old when you realize that there are keys on your keychain and you don't have a clue where they came from or what they're for. And that is exactly what I asked myself the other day, Where the fuck did this key come from? And then I start thinking back to all the things I have ever opened with keys. And christ, I am always opening things with keys. So what is this key? Does it open a treasure chest? Does some dude walk around town putting random keys on people's keychains just to fuck with them? Fuck.

In hindsight washing my hockey equipment at my girlfriend's house probably wasn't a way to bring us closer together.

I just got contacts the other week. I didn't know how great life could be until I got the opportunity to jab myself in the eyes with my index finger everyday.

Theres nothing worse than losing your driver's license and having to get into the bar with your passport.

Rogers Park is kind of what I imagine hell to be like.

I've been told you really haven't lived until you see Dirty Dancing. I just starting living last week. That movie was so intense, the dancing....so dirty.. the passion. the romance, Jennifer Grey sans nosejob. I am forever changed.

I had a "Manwich" for dinner tonight.

I could really use a nice cold bottle of miller high life light right about now.

Everyone needs a little champagne in their lives.