Back to the Office

Have you ever tried to make a call on your cell phone after a long day of work and for some reason the call won't go through? And you look down at your phone and realize that you just dialed 9 before your buddy's number.

Have you ever automatically woken up at 6:00am on a Saturday morning even though you were out to all hours of the night drinking bottled beer and overpriced cocktails, just out of habit?

Have you ever caught yourself sticking post-it notes with little reminders of things you need to accomplish around your apartment?

Have you come to realization that when you used to say "I really need a drink" back in college, you didn't really know what it was like to "really need a drink," but now you think you do?

Have you ever stopped for a moment and noticed that you no longer openly complain about things? That ever since you joined the rank and file of the corporate world, you find yourself saying to your boss, "that was really challenging," instead of "that really fucking sucked."

Have you found that you cringe everytime you open your mailbox, because all you seem to find are new bills that need to be paid and never the Cocoa Pebbles decoder ring that you mailed in your 3 proof of purchases for back in 1985?

Have you ever noticed that all the coffee in the world never seems to help cure a bad hangover, but a job threatening, quickly impending, project deadline always seems to do the trick?

Have you come to the conclusion that if it's true that chicks dig scars and rockstars with multiplatinum debut albums, and you work behind a desk 45 hours a week; that you will probably be single until their sophmore slump at the least and possibly longer?

Have you ever been out at the bar and realize that you just spent the last 20 minutes talking to one of your buddies about how much money you plan to put into your 401K plan, instead of how hot the brunette waitress is standing at the other end of the bar?

Have you come to the realization that the whole concept of having a balance between work and leisure, is an unattainable fucking pipe dream?

So Have I.

I really need a drink.