Monday, June 14, 2004

The Bachelor Party

My mom is very Catholic. And she gets pissed off when I don't go to church. So whenever I leave town for the weekend and come stumbling in on Sunday afternoon, hungover as hell, I'm always welcomed by a stern Middle aged woman standing at the door with her arms crossed. No, "Hi, how was your weekend." or "How are you doing," the first thing out of her mouth is always "did you go to Church today?"

She asked me that very question yesterday and I answered back, "no, but I did go watch a couple strippers."

You see, on Saturday I went to my first Bachelor party. Now, I won't get into how scary the idea is that one of my friends is getting married because that one is for another day, but I will talk about those strippers.

The night started out at a bar in downtown Chicago, where we were given a bright green t-shirt by the best man that said, "If you can't remember it never happened" so we all could be positively identified as the 25 animals that were going to drink the bar clean.

The best man set up a $20 all you can drink deal at this bar, which usually ends up being a scam cause they typically have one bartender in a fully packed bar serving watered down drinks, but not at this place. Everything in the bar including shots were free. People were lining up shot after shot of southern comfort, rumplemintz, tequila..... all while pounding gin and tonics made with top shelf booze. That was great and all but what I really wanted was either a Gin and Fresca, or a Rum and Tab and they didn't have either of those, so I was kind of disapointed, but I digress.

25 guys were just drinking everything they could get their hands on with a 5 minute break every 20 drinks to puke, yak, or partake in reverse peristalsis (if you want to get all medical about it) in the bar's bathroom.

There probably is no rational reason for drinking like that, but hey, my buddy is getting married so sometimes a little irrational behavior is neccesary.

After stumbling out of the bar and leaving the groom to be in charge of leading us to his recently purchased condo, we find ourselves almost 2 miles away from his place and completely lost.

check back tommorrow for the rest of the story