The other day I was thinking about the time I was on the Bozo show. The Bozo show was a phenomenal clown show that used to be on WGN. If you were awesome you probably used to watch it. Anyways, I was wondering to myself, what the hell does a clown do after his show is cancelled. Does he just hang out in his house and drink beers all day, or take classes at a community college, or do stand up comedy at shady bars?

It's really weird when some of your friends are getting married, co-workers are having kids, and all you can say for yourself is that you think that a polish waitress in high heels might have winked at you last night, although she also might have just had something in her eye like dust or something.

Easter is coming up on Sunday. Alot of you are on vacation now and I hate you for it. All I get for Easter is an early Monday morning wakeup with a bad hangover.

When you were younger, did you think the Easter Bunny was a huge bunny like at the mall, or a regular sized bunny? I always thought it was a little bunny that just hopped around your house and laid eggs, which is funny because last time I checked bunny's don't lay eggs. I knew I shouldn't have eaten all those crayons.