Wednesday, March 24, 2004

Nokia 3560

When AT&T tells you that you can get a free phone if you sign a one year contract with them, they are lying.

Yeah the phone is free in theory, but they always conveniently forget tell you that the phone is going to ruin your life. Sometimes I feel like I'd like to run to the top of a very tall building and throw my Nokia 3560 as far off into the distance as possible, so that I never have to see it again. But with my luck it's probably one of those boomerang phones.

All i want for the love of God is a normal ring. I don't want "disco club" or "rastafarian beach party." I want a fucking "ring, ring." You know what a phone is supposed to sound like. There's nothing better than when you're working, or at like at a funeral or something and you forget to put mute on and the "zippa dee do da" ring goes off in your pocket.

Why are there 6 video games on my phone? I don't play video games and even if I did these are the worst possible games of all time. Backgammon? what did I do to deserve this phone? All i want to do is make phone calls, i don't want to play tiddlywinks or do my taxes with it, I just want to talk to people.

And the reception never fails to be horrible. Constantly doing an indian raindance around your house trying to appease the cell phone gods, hoping that you can make out even a few words of what some drunken idiot is trying to tell you at 2 in the morning.

And the free AT&T phones are always the ones without the memory chip. You know what I'm talking about right? You wake up one morning to turn on your phone, and it's completely dead. You bring it back to the store, and they're like "yeah we can fix it for $39.99, but you know we won't be able to recover any of your numbers." And it's at that point that you realize that you have lost every phone number you ever knew and you cry for a while. Then 2 weeks later you find out how many friends you actually have.